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Friday 17 January 2014

My Struggle Against Pornography


There is no humour here, no jokes, none of my usual light-hearted banter, and no clever wordplay either.  I am deadly serious, because this is a deadly serious business.  I have a struggle with online pornography.  It’s not a decades long problem, nor is it something that I have indulged in every day for years and years either, it is something that has been a problem, in one form and another, for many years on and off.  For years, or many months in a year, I manage to avoid thinking about woman in that way, and don’t go near porn because I literally have no desire to look.  I may say this also, that I am always aware that looking at any kind of porn, however innocuous or ‘lads mag’ or Benny Hill sketch saucy it may appear, is not in any way acceptable to God no matter how prevalent it may be, when soft porn pix pop up in lads mags*, many daily British newspapers, adverts in all kinds of magazines, in music videos, risqué lingerie adverts on your email account and on TV shows and on all kinds of films now.  For the man especially, who truly wants to avoid the softest of soft porn that can be seen almost anywhere, it’s as if we are alone and cast adrift on a raft, surrounded by potential temptation all around with no island of safety or security in sight.  The first problem with anything that could be considered erotic, i.e. anything that sexually arouses a person, is that it is all abhorrent to God however innocuous or ‘a bit of a laugh’ it may seem.  Secondly, it is being disobedient to God.  Thirdly, it is making a human being, someone who God specifically created just like you and me into an object to be leered at, or fantasise over; and usually whatever else follows.  Fourthly, like any addiction, there will be a desire to see more and more, and more often, and then to get bored with the usual stuff and want to see more explicit material, perhaps more questionable material, and whatever the case it could become a spiral of degradation where more and more extreme porn is needed just to titillate and arouse, whilst becoming more and more numb to the growing extreme nature of what is being viewed, which months before might have been too shocking to contemplate.  It is the classic case of diminishing returns: the more you give into porn, the less you get back.  For me, it brings no good, no happiness and no peace, only emptiness and shame.  Fifthly, and obviously far more dangerously, some people may want to act out in some way what they might see in the sad deranged porn fantasy world they are inhabiting.  Then we are talking about serious ramifications, family disgrace, spells in prison.  And beyond the human ramifications that may come someone’s way, there will be punishment from God too.  I think numbers of even serious porn addicts will not take it to such extremes, but there seems to be a sinister growing trend in that direction.  Whichever way it goes though, a porn addict is still a sad, pathetic, imbalanced individual and living in a shadow world of sordid fantasy of the worst kind, which may take complete precedence over any balanced, truly Godly and just normal reality.  Even if it doesn’t involve people in a real sense, only virtually, what a sad life that is.  Who wants to be like that?  I really truly do not.  And you are far from God too, the only one who can really help you.  I want to add one more thing to this list, an addendum if you like.  Someone may just be looking for the archetypal ‘t*ts ‘n’ b*ms’ stuff, adolescent lads stuff, the naughty nurse in lingerie or the Benny Hill sketch ladies, but as they trawl more and more sites in the desperation to be turned on and overload the sensory pleasure organ, or whatever the scientific term is, there is a real danger that you might stumble across something you were not particularly looking for, which might shock you… but at the same time may give you a visceral thrill… where might that lead to?

(*lads mags are the type of magazines aimed at young men and red blooded males and almost always have pictures of scantily clad mid-twenties females in them, amongst other things.  They are rarely bought for their intellectual content or quality of argument and debate.)


I am writing about this and obviously concerned because I don’t want to end up a chronic porn addict, I really don’t.  I am not too proud to admit it could happen to me, and nor should anyone else drawn in any way to linger on anything which sexually arouses them.  If you think you can’t fall, that’s just when you might.

 

Even if you don’t act out any kind of fantasy, do you want to end up a sad, pathetic man, a half shadow, sitting in front of a PC screen hours every day?

 

I have a struggle against this, but I am at least battling against it, with church, accountability and filter software and of course asking God into every area of it through prayer and regular Bible study, and the knowledge importantly that it is all completely repugnant to God, and that He absolutely does not want us to indulge in at any level.  Combat it firstly by taking it all to God, the whole mess of your life and the fact you may have hit rock bottom with this or any other serious issue or addiction.  Then close down everything and anything which is a problem or may become in any way a problem.  If you do talk about it to a Christian friend, or your wife or girlfriend or church elder or vicar or priest, or whoever you can totally trust, you don’t need to be specific or graphic in any way, you just need to say you have a problem and leave it at that.  A Godly person will respond sympathetically and will want to help you genuinely get over the problem without offering platitudes.  They will also tell you to get back to God, to pray and ask for forgiveness and tell you to study the Bible and verses that pertain to this problem.  Keep away from sexual immorality. All other sins that people may commit are done outside the body; but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body.  Do you not realise that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you and whom you received from God?  You are not your own property, then; you have been bought at a price. So use your body for the glory of God.  (1 Corinthians 6:18-20 NJB)

 

One thing I would like to add is that God has put in me a sense of distaste and disgust for it all, even when I have been viewing it, and genuinely I thank Him for pulling me back from the edge.  But please understand, though there are men who have been far more seriously addicted to pornography than me and for far longer, there is no smugness or complacency in me about this whatsoever, because I know this is a slippery slope and God has placed it in my heart to have a real fear about disobeying, a deep sense of disgust at viewing what may seem innocuous and a broader sense of how pathetic and lonely to sit in front of a PC screen and get any kind of real satisfaction from looking at pornography of even the mildest variety.  Is this what God created me for, or anyone else for that matter, to live in a shadow world, like the undead, a half-life that at best will only end in futility and more emptiness, and at worst who knows where?

 

For men in the UK, there is no real provision for this on a particularly Christian level although there are of course very good Twelve Step Recovery programs in some churches which I recommend, and there are secular sex addictions organisations in the UK too.  As you will notice, I have added a lot of links to this post as I think many of them will be relevant and I have looked at a number of them myself.  Anything which keeps a person on the straight and narrow will have some value. 

 

Here’s a prayer about this problem that might help or you can chop and change as you feel fit:

Lord I am in the midst of an enormous struggle:

Help me to do the things you want me to do,

And help me not to do the things you don’t want me to do,

Help me to flee this immorality completely, to resist this immorality completely

And as much as is humanly possible to bear it when I am overwhelmed,

But knowing that I cannot do this in my own strength, I ask you to bring your strength,

The indwelling of your Holy Spirit in me and the covering of your grace which is so much bigger than my compulsion to view porn.

Have mercy and compassion on me, and take pity on me as I struggle against this problem oh Lord, amen.

 

In the recent past, I have had a desire to indulge and at the same time a heart after God’s own heart; flawed like King David, but whose heart was in the right place.  A spiritual madness and a crazed desire seems to overwhelm me.  I do not understand my own behaviour; I do not act as I mean to, but I do things that I hate.  While I am acting as I do not want to, I still acknowledge the Law as good, so it is not myself acting, but the sin which lives in me.  And really, I know of nothing good living in me - in my natural self, that is - for though the will to do what is good is in me, the power to do it is not: the good thing I want to do, I never do; the evil thing which I do not want - that is what I do.  But every time I do what I do not want to, then it is not myself acting, but the sin that lives in me.  (Romans 7:15-20 NJB)  Lust and the desire to view porn can also obviously involve fantasy, fantasies of domination, control and power: to take advantage of someone sexually is much like the desire to dominate, control and have power in the world in the spheres of things like business, politics, law and in the hierarchies of many things too, perhaps even in some organised religion.  I may add that these desires, not particularly sexual in themselves, can fuel illicit desire and perhaps more importantly are part of the world’s fallen and corrupted nature.    

 


I just wanted to add this thing too; many kinds of pornography are seen specifically as something men look at and get addicted to.  Men are seen as disgusting for wanting to view women’s bodies but few mention the reality that online porn is now also a serious and growing problem for women too.  According to recent statistics I have seen, 8% of American men are seriously addicted to viewing porn and 3% of American women.  That is hardly a serious discrepancy, when many people might think that it might be twenty men to every one women viewing porn.  This is really one woman for every two men, which is probably very surprising to many people.  I would say that this is a serious problem for many men and many women now, the only thing different is that men are far more likely to admit they have a problem than many women are!  Most men are far more likely to be drawn to provocative and sexy pictures than a woman is, or that’s how society tends to see these things, but after spending some time researching this, it seems that many women are now also chronically addicted to viewing even hard core pornography online.  As for the statistics, I think that in most developed countries including the UK, those would be pretty similar to the American stats.  I would like to add this too: it seems that in some circles, maybe you might call them feminist but maybe you wouldn’t at all, there seems to be an attitude that it empowers women to show off their bodies in a raunchy or provocative and sexy way… yet if men are enticed to look at these women, the men are filthy perverts!  There is a double standard here that hardly ever gets mentioned, and may be actually beside the point, but somehow it’s ok for women to make money through showing themselves off, but we men shouldn’t look at the same time!  The entertainment industry like music and TV and movies often nurtures titillation and soft porn to win high ratings figures and get people buying or watching, and the ad industry can be the same, making sexually provocative ads to draw people in and sell products.  This seems to be acceptable and not acceptable at the same time!  Acceptable because it makes lots of money for someone or some business, and unacceptable in the eyes of ‘respectable’ society even though this is only paying lip service really.  Perhaps the viewing of pornography is really symptomatic of a deeply corrupt and deeply fallen world, when people abandon God and make something else an idol or obsession instead.

 

It happened towards evening when David had got up from resting and was strolling on the palace roof, that from the roof he saw a woman bathing; the woman was very beautiful.  David made enquiries about this woman and was told, 'Why, that is Bathsheba daughter of Eliam and wife of Uriah the Hittite.' David then sent messengers to fetch her. She came to him, and he lay with her, just after she had purified herself from her period. She then went home again.  The woman conceived and sent word to David, 'I am pregnant.' (2 Samuel 11:2-5 NJB)  David had the power to carry out his complete desires, but most men do not.  And if it can happen to a man after God’s own heart, it can happy to anyone.  David’s adultery and womanising eventually caused all kinds of problems for him as it will for anyone.  Getting involved in that way seems merely to complicate matters and it never brought David any real lasting happiness. 

 

I had made an agreement with my eyes not to linger on any virgin.  (Job 31:1 NJB)  Keeping your eyes off the ladies, virgins or not, is the first practical step and a brick in the wall of defence you must build to keep you far and away from this problem.  If you allow yourself to ogle, and look someone up and down, you are half way to fantasising about them and other women (or men).  Averting the eyes is one of the strategies recommended in a number of books.  Don’t make it obvious, but be discreet.  You know how fellas can be discreet when they are eyeing someone up?!  Then be equally discreet about not getting an eyeful as well!

 

Wash me clean from my guilt, purify me from my sin.  For I am well aware of my offences, my sin is constantly in mind.  Against you, you alone, I have sinned, I have done what you see to be wrong, that you may show your saving justice when you pass sentence, and your victory may appear when you give judgement  (Psalm 51:2-4 NJB)  We can overcome this sin, this desire to view porn and all that goes with it, and we can become pure again, made anew, but we must acknowledge our guilt, confess our shame to God and ask Him to change our hearts.  It can be done.

 

Some links to look at.

http://www.12step.com/12stepprograms.html Twelve Step programs of all kinds.

http://www.devinrose.heroicvirtuecreations.com/blog/overcoming-sexual-addiction/ A Catholic flavoured testimony, but well worth looking at.




http://www.wholeperson-counseling.org/sexual/pornaddict.html A straight forward, hard hitting summary, backed up with scripture, with a warning!

http://www.wholeperson-counseling.org/sexual/masturbation.html A thoughtful article, backed scripturally, about the ‘M’ word.



 

Some links you MUST read if you are struggling seriously with this and other related issues. PLEASE AT LEAST READ THE FIRST ONE IF YOU CLICK ON NO OTHER LINK.

http://www.pureintimacy.org/d/dangers-and-disappointments-of-pornography/ It is vital YOU read this if you have a problem you want to overcome, and you understand the dangers of getting in too deep.

http://christiananswers.net/q-eden/edn-f017.html Struggles with overcoming lust.

http://www.settingcaptivesfree.com/courses/way-of-purity/ A free 60 day course for overcoming sexual addictions. Some of the testimonies on the home page are worth reading too.



 

Other links.


http://www.purelifeministries.org/home This is a good one, with some free resources particularly useful, the articles especially.

http://www.purecommunity.org/ Interesting blog about lust and related issues.




http://www.amazon.co.uk/Christian-sexual-addiction-self-help-books/lm/R10UYZC19G20JT/ref=cm_lmt_dtpa_f_1_rdssss0 British Amazon link to a number of self-help books on porn, sex addiction and related subjects which you can buy.  I think most of them are on the US Amazon site too.

http://www.saa-recovery.org.uk/ I think this may be a secular organisation, but it looks good.

http://www.slaauk.org/ This may be a secular organisation too, but it looks good.

 

some links for singles.


 

A link to K9 filter software.
http://www1.k9webprotection.com/

24 comments:

  1. Hi Tim,
    all of us have things that we struggle to overcome, but when we remember that it is a spiritual warfare and Satan is the tempter, then it is put into perspective. You wouldn't let a thief into your house, why should you let Satan rob you of all the things that God has to offer. My past is full of things that I struggled with, but when I handed them over to God I realized just how strong a warrior Jesus is. Do not let the devil win Tim, take every thought captive and recognize where it is coming from. Then bring it into obedience to Christ. Hebrews ch.10 v. 26 is coming into my mind 'For if we sin wilfully after we have received the knowledge of the truth, there remains no more sacrifice for sins' Draw close to God and the devil will flee from you.

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  2. This is an excellent post. Women have these struggles too. Your openess is good. We are told in the Bible to confess our sins to one another so that we can pray for one another and encourage one another. I have been keeping u in my prayers, u and a few other guys i know on facebook who have confessed that they have struggles in this area too, but they're resisting the urges. We are told to resist the enemy and he will flee. We can pray for God'd perfect strength to help us in our weakness.

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  3. This scripture is helpful and encouraging. " Blessed is the man that endureth temptation: for when he is tried, he shall receive the crown of life, which the Lord hath promised to them that love Him." James 1:12.

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  4. Tim, I applaud your forthrightness! I know one or two might think "and he calls himself a Christian." But those kind of folks don't understand that we, none of us, are perfect - never have been, never will be this side of Heaven. We are simply forgiven. And most every Christian has some besetting sin that they struggle with daily or frequently. For me, it's foul language. I'm no potty mouth. I can go all day for days and not say a foul word. But when my back is against the wall, when my temper hits me hard and fast, I revert back to sailor language. It's good you recognize your weak point. Good you turn to God for strength, forgiveness and help. And a blessing that you are bold enough and sure enough in Christ's love for you to share with others that might share the same struggles. And it is important to remember that all and any sin causes seperation of fellowship with God. The white lie that is unconfessed cuts us off from Him just like the more "hideous" sins like adultery. Since none, not one, has ever been sinless, no one has the right to look down upon you or me. Thank God our Jesus sees us for not who we are now, but who we can become in Him! That our Father sees only the blood of His precious Son when He looks upon us! All love in Christ, Barbara

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  5. Hi Tim,
    I love all the encouraging comments. It is good to bring that which is in darkness out into the light. A sin is a sin and there is no one sin worse then another except the sin of blaspheming the Holy Spirit. A lie, in Father's eye, is the same as adultery. Guilty. All of us are guilty and all of us have forgiveness available if we seek it. Some sins are harder to break then others but through Jesus Christ it can and will be broken, we just need to keep giving it to Him, repenting when we fall, read His Word and obey. He is the overcomer and He will free the path for you, keep seeking Him.

    I have an issue with obedience and that is the word I was given to focus on for 2014. You see, I have a fear of man. Father has placed in front of me things that make my stomach turn to jello and my knees weak but He has asked obedience and I choose to obey Him over self and I know He will provide everything I need if I seek Him.

    Great post and good links.

    Blessings brother, :)
    <><

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  6. I also struggle against this. Back when our Heavenly Father first started making Himself real unto me, He gave me a clear demonstration of His power to change us by completely cleaning up my language. For I could not say three words in a row without at least one of them being cuss-word, and this was done without any conscious effort on my part. Neither was there any conscious effort on my part to clean up my language, and yet, I completely stopped cussing.

    Ah, but He left far too much of ME intact for my own comfort, and much of that had to do with my very great appreciation for the female form. Be assured that I seriously considered gouging my eyes out in order to avoid sinning against Him, but He allowed and enabled me to see that this would not stop the torment. In fact, I could see much more when my eyes were closed.

    It is not nearly as bad these days, but that does not have anything to do with me making a dedicated effort to resist. For I am still just as helpless as I was before I was allowed and enabled to have a very close and personal relationship with our Heavenly Father, and the only relief I get is when He keeps my tormentors at bay.

    Please keep Romans 7:14-8:4 in mind when "good Christians" go to tell YOU that you can beat this, which is just what the devil and his demons want us to believe. For even when someone is claiming to have gained victory over something through the power of Christ Jesus, they are wanting to believe that they won through the skillful use of the spiritual weapons He gave them to wield in far too many cases.

    Be assured that the victory our Heavenly Father wants each of His children by faith to have is in their willingness to keep giving Him the full benefit of their considerable doubts while being under attack from all angles. This is what 1 Corinthians 10:13 is all about--not that He will keep the faithful from sinning.

    Of course, it is quite natural of us to want to believe that what we are doing is okay, and this is something that the devil and his demons seek to exploit. Woe be it unto those who would like to think that there is nothing wrong with porn--regardless of how soft it may be.

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  7. I will pray for you about this issue, Tim.

    While many people who do the dominance and submission thing are evil, there are those for whom dominance can be more accurately termed "caring for."

    Though ultimately everything is accomplished in and through Christ, we have to do what we can in a physical sense to overcome sins like this.

    Paul also said he had fought the good fight and run the race. The Spirit does what the law couldn't do in that we now have God's grace to help us with sins when we stumble.

    We can resist temptation if we look to God for our escape.

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  8. "We can resist temptation if we look to God for our escape."

    That is indeed true in the long run, my dear Alex, but not always when it comes to daily attacks. Be assured that the only reason why someone is able to resist a temptation is because of it not being in accordance to our Heavenly Father's will for them to fall at the time.

    This applies to even those who do not really know our Heavenly Father. My apparent ability to "just say no" to drugs back when I was a Christian in name only serves as a good example of that. For I was never tempted to try marijuana, cocaine, crank, crystal meth, nor anything else like that without having a smidgen of what we naturally consider to be self-control. The fact of the matter concerning my consumption of gallons upon gallons of beer and whisky just because I liked it in spite of clearly seeing the damage that was being done should serve as sufficient proof in and of itself that I do not have any natural self-control.

    Alas, there is much about my past that I am deeply ashamed of, but I am most thankful for having it proven to me beyond a shadow of any doubt that I am not in complete control of my actions--neither for the good, nor bad. For I cannot be tempted to take credit for what our Heavenly Father has actually done for me.

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  9. Great post and excellent comments, and I especially agree with Jerry, Brenda, Child of God, oh and Barbara in Caneyhead, I also can go days without the bad words (although I do say things that reveal my doubt in God's faithfulness, especially while I'm driving, sigh)...we all sin, and like we read in 1 John 1:8, if we "think we have no sin we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us"
    however:
    "If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to If we say we have not sinned, we make him a liar, and his word is not in us." 1 John 1:9,10

    All these things is not to beat ourselves or each other over the head with, it is to lead us to Jesus for forgiveness. He is forgiving, but it is humiliating to admit that we need forgiveness and mean it from the deepest lowest depths of the heart with painful remorse. We must love the Lord and His forgiveness MORE THAN we love sin, and we all do love sin. It is our fallen nature to love sin, to love titillating stories, gossip, the dirt on other people, and otherwise the gossip magazines would go out of business, but instead they thrive! We need to see that, fully, and then ask Jesus to help us love Him more than we love sin, to love Him more than we love the things of this world.

    We will all die one day, our life is like a vapor. Do we cherish the things that are passing away more than the things Jesus has promised us when we are eternally with Him? I know that I'm guilty every day of loving things of this world, things that will rust or turn to dust and mean nothing when I'm dead.

    Will Jesus say to me "well done good and faithful servant?" or will He say "Depart from Me, I never knew you!" I hope and pray that He will make me faithful. And hope it for you too Tim.

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  10. Jerry, i'm having trouble understanding some of the things you said. Someone said, "We can resist temptation if we look to God for our escape." but you said that doesn't work all the time. What that person said is biblical, that wasn't personal opinion. It's said in the Bible God provides a exit out of temptation, if you don't take it, then it's your fault, not because it didn't work. If you claim you lookef to God for the exit and it didn't work, maybe that person really didn't look to God in truth, because they perhaps didn't know how, or didn't want to.

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  11. And jerry, to help out anyone who might misunderstand your comment, can u explain what you meant when you said, " Please keep Romans 7:14-8:4 in mind when "good Christians" go to tell YOU that you can beat this, which is just what the devil and his demons want us to believe. " i don't ever remember a time a demon ever wanted a person to believe they can beat any sin. I think i get what your trying to say but it's not clear :-) Romans 7 is important and good to know though.

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  12. Part 1 of 2: Can you honestly say, my dear Sateigdra, that you are completely without sin at this time? If not, is it that our Heavenly Father has failed you, or is it that you don’t want to be completely free of sin? I know I cannot say that I am completely without sin, and with our Heavenly Father as my witness, I can honestly say that I want to be more perfect in all of my own ways than ever, despite now understanding more about just how immeasurable His grace truly is than I dared to consider while preaching Hell-fire and brimstone from the pulpit of the very conservative Southern Baptist church I was serving as pastor of 33 years ago. After all, if a man of God gives a sinner an inch, they will take a mile, and preaching too much about the grace of God to those who have not learned to fear Him first just encourages wickedness—right?

    Of course, it is widely taught that the journey toward Holiness is a long and winding road that takes years to complete. Be assured that this is a lie straight from the devil’s mouth to the ears of all who want to have faith in themselves. For our Heavenly Father can make even the most vile of sinners completely righteous in all of their own ways in a twinkling of an eye without them having to do a thing—not even as little as just asking for this change to be made!

    Now, this is not to say that we can have no part to play in any change in our character. For our Heavenly Father wants His children by faith to want to be just like Him, but the more the devil and his demons can convince us to believe that it is up to us to clean up our own lives, the farther away from our Heavenly Father we drift. For how can one truly have full and complete faith in Him to cleanse their soul of all iniquity if they think that it is expected of them to fight the good fight against sin in their own strength, and if it is by His strength, then it has to be His victory to win—right?

    Evidently, the Apostle Paul did not receive the message that He had been given the power to keep sin at bay. For in Romans 7:14-8:4, he makes it quite clear that he keeps doing sinful things that he no longer wants to do while being totally dependent upon the grace afforded him through the sacrifice that Christ Jesus made for all of us.

    Again, I can honestly say that I want to be more perfect in all of my own ways than ever, and understanding better than ever just how far away from perfection I naturally am is like torture to me, which is the way it was for the Apostle Paul—be assured. Now, I do believe that my Lord and Savior will complete the good work that He has begun in me someday, but that does little to soften the deep sense of shame I feel every time I do something sinful.

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  13. Part 2 of 2: Having a clear understanding of what our Heavenly Father wants to accomplish in this world is the key to understanding why sin was allowed to enter into it in the first place. For our Heavenly Father wants to receive a very special kind of love from us, which requires giving Him the full benefit of our considerable doubts in spite of it appearing much more likely that He created most (if not all) of us to be the objects of His scorn—certainly not His affections. Be assured that a big part of this is fully accepting that NOTHING can happen without it being in accordance to our Heavenly Father’s will

    The role of the devil and his demons is to make our sins all the more egregious, and the most egregious sin a Christian can make is thinking that it is up to them to do anything. In fact, this is the unpardonable sin for those who have been allowed and enabled to know and understand that the only thing good about any of us is the presence of our Heavenly Father, albeit in the form of His Holy Spirit.

    In the spirit of full disclosure, I must admit to letting Satan get to me too much by thinking of myself as being a miserable failure in service to our Heavenly Father. For if it is indeed true that it is only through Him that I can do anything good, how can I be blamed for any apparent failures? On the other hand, our Heavenly Father wants His chosen servants to want to work with Him, and if I drag my feet after He has told me to move, this is certainly something that I can be blamed for.

    Be assured that it is the same when it comes to resisting sin. For if I want to keep doing something that I clearly know and fully understand to be sinful, I cannot be considered blameless for the consequences.

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  14. Jerry i wasn't able to read through all of what u replied. I honesty don't understand what it is u was specifically going on about in all of your comments. But what i did read showed me that perhaps u misunderstood my comment. I never in any way in my comment say that i wasn't a sinner. I have no clue why u said that. No need to reply to this jerry. Thanks for your other replies. Thid is tims post and i enjoyed reading it. I read the comments of the others, i understood theirs, but not yours. Thats all.

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  15. Alas, my dear Sateigdra, I must admit that I am very disappointed. For I did not take you for one who issues a challenge and then runs away when it is answered.

    The reason why I started the reply as I did was to address what you said, which is: "If you claim you looked to God for the exit and it didn't work, maybe that person really didn't look to God in truth, because they perhaps didn't know how, or didn't want to."

    In all fairness, you switched (in midsentence) from it being me who looked to God and it didn't work to it maybe being that the person who did so didn't really look to God in truth, which is quite confusing. In any event, my reply was not meant as a personal attack, but it was meant to encourage you to honestly take a good look in the mirror when you insinuate that it must be the fault of the Christian when they remain in sin after asking for deliverance.

    No, you cannot have it both ways. For if it is indeed true that our Heavenly Father will deliver His children by faith from sin when they truly want Him to, then all who remain in sin must be liars when they claim to have asked Him to deliver them out of sin or that it all depends upon what our Heavenly Father wants to accomplish in and through them.

    The second part of my reply was meant to help explain why our Heavenly Father created us as we naturally are to live in this world as we do, which changes everything in comparison to what has been so widely taught in His most holy and precious name for far too long. For almost all of the doctrines of almost all of the major Christian denominations are based (in one way or another) upon the premise that sin was never meant to enter into this world.

    Come on now, does this not portray our Heavenly Father in a very poor light--not to mention giving non-believers good reason to think of us as being fools? For if it was possible for things to go terribly wrong in the Garden of Eden, who can say that this cannot happen again, and if it can happen again, then just how secure will eternity be for any of us--regardless of how much faith one wants to have in the existence of the Lord God Almighty and His Gospel of the Lord Jesus Christ?

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  16. We aren't talking about Tim being made completely perfect; we are talking about him overcoming the sin of looking up pornography.

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  17. Jerry I didn't issue a challenge i just asked 2 questions i believe. I didn't run away, as u put it, i was simply trying to end a conversation that seemed to be going on and on. Your replies were really long and i just didn't see any sense in going on forever commenting beneath Tim's post. I had no intention on debating with u, just wanted u to explain some of the comments u made about demons and the devil and so on. It seems really silly to me now, even asking u to explain to begin with because had i imagine u would take my comment to u as a challenge, i wouldn't have made it. Thanks anyway for an interesting discussion.

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  18. Thank you for bringing that point up, my dear Alex. For our Heavenly Father pointed out to me as I was trying to get some sleep around eight hours ago that I had not maintained a clear line between the two issues, and I was planning on bringing it up here when I was able to.

    The two issues are really just one issue, which has to do with our Heavenly Father's timing. For it is indeed true that He will indeed make all of His children by faith as perfect in their character as He is, but as it is with delivering us from physical ailments, it may not be until one's time as a part of this world comes to an end before He does so.

    It all depends upon what He wants to accomplish in and through each individual. In my own case, He has completely changed the way I see things, along with instantly cleansing my mouth of all foul language, but He kept the overwhelming desires for sexual satisfaction burning inside of me mostly intact, which now causes me a great deal of anguish because of seeing just how abominable being like I naturally am is. He did this as part of keeping me humble with all of the knowledge and understanding He has given me. For how can I become all high and mighty with anyone while I am still so disgusting myself?

    I am sorry I went on and on far too much for your comfort, my dear Sateigdra. I was just trying to place into written form what our Heavenly Father was giving me to say, which should be of great value to those who really want to understand what is going on, but it has been made abundantly clear to me that to those who do not want to hear it, going on and on like that is extremely irritating. Be assured that I have no desire to be an irritant to you.

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  19. Your "going on and on" is all right with me Jerry, and I wholeheartedly agree that the bottom line is that God does everything IN HIS PERFECT TIME. Every religion on the planet preaches and teaches how we can perfect ourselves by doing X, Y, &Z. Only Jesus says "Come unto me ye who are heavy laden and I will give you rest", and there is more about this rest in Hebrews Ch 4, and that there is a danger of falling short of coming into that rest. We naturally want to do it ourselves. We think we have that power, to transform ourselves. I see many who say they are Christians, say they rely on and love Jesus, and then list all the things that prove why they are a "good person" when the Bible says NONE ARE GOOD and that ONLY God is good, yet they will say they are forgiven because:
    1. they confessed
    2. they chose
    3. they tithe
    4 they have communion
    5. they fellowship with other believers
    etc etc etc

    But there is no other way to be saved except by forgiveness through the cross...it is what Jesus DID, not what we DO, that changes us.

    I get it, Jerry, and hope Tim does too, because the struggle is so hard until that heavy burden is lifted by Jesus IN HIS TIME. :)

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  20. Thank you so very much for the encouragement, my dear Susan!!! There is a danger of using Him as an excuse for poor behavior, but those who truly want to have a very close and personal relationship with Him will know when they are messing up what He wants to accomplish in and through them. Well, at least He lets me know when I do. Be assured that I wish I was much better at just being one of His kids by faith.

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  21. Jerry there is a huge difference between using Jesus as an excuse for bad behavior and truly being born of the Spirit and resting in what He has done. Jesus most scathing comments were to the religionists of that day, the pharisees. If we could have witnessed those scenes many today would say "Why is Jesus picking on the good people and sticking up for the bad ones?" Because there aren't ANY good people, and the ones who think that they are good are the worst because they are doing it themselves instead of being transformed by God's Spirit. They have an appearance of godliness but deny His power. I'm not saying that this is true of Ms. Knowles, only God can say if that is true because He can see deep into her life to know what is going on there. But some of the "nicest seeming" people might actually be in the worst pridefilled spiritual condition. If God isn't doing the changing, it isn't happening.

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  22. Very well said, my dear Susan!

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  23. "T Child's Christianity Blog" has been included in the Sites To See for this week. Be assured that I hope this helps to point many new visitors in your direction.

    http://asthecrackerheadcrumbles.blogspot.com/2014/02/sites-to-see_14.html

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  24. Hi Tim,

    I have 2 blogs, the article you were seeking was on the other one:

    http://susanflutterbys.blogspot.com/2014/01/liebster-award-winners.html

    I should have also included Jerry's blog on that list... I'll do a separate write up about his FishHawk Droppings later today :)

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